From the post "Flirting: Friendly or Foolish?" there were some interesting comments made and one had me thinking about another topic: Perception.
I had been thinking about this for the past month about how a lot of people can get discouraged when they think they are in life alone. I have seen this many times this past year being involved in ministry and Life Group and seeing it in my own life from time to time. When someone perceives that they are the only ones who care, the only ones who have this mission, the only ones who give and sacrifice it brings them to a point of not wanting to do those hard things any more.
In the life of Elijah in the Old Testament, this happened for him as well. After he had this great piece of showing God's power to the nation by himself, he runs when challenged by the queen, not willing to make that stand once more. This lone ranger syndrome is seen when God tells him how there are more like Elijah in hiding waiting for the right time. He wasn't alone.
Perception as well keeps people excited about joining in. If others perceive that the church staff is busy and doing things to minister to people, they respond to serve and give to the cause. If others perceive that the church is not a sinking ship, they want to be a part of it. If others perceive that other people are involved in doing ministry, there is less of a tendency to try make people feel guilty for being a spectator.
Perception can go negative in other ways too. If others think that someone is rich, then they don't they ever need help. If there's someone who went to seminary, then they don't need any spiritual guidance. If someone is poor, then they are dumb.
With the proper perception, one can continue the mission for the right reason, spur one another on without using manipulation tactics, and refrain from thinking other people do nothing.
But this takes getting to know what's going on in more than just our little personal world and telling others about what you're doing (without sounding boastful, of course).
What's going on with you? What are ways perception has faulted reality?
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Flirting: Friendly or Foolish?
Cheating. What comes to your mind? If it's a young person, it's taking the short cut on a test for school. If it's an older person, it's taking the short cut to feel loved and intimate in marriage.
I wonder where the term "cheat" was first use to describe this? The bible commonly uses the word adultery. But more specifically, my real thought for the day is wondering whether flirting is cheating or is it just "innocent" friendly dialogue (quotations because those who flirt often say "oh, I didn't mean anything by it".
I say this not because I'm currently guilty of this (nor am I saying I've never been), I'm just saying. Flirting seems like nothing, but it doesn't usually happen when a spouse is around, it happens to people the person finds attractive, it happened as you were making decisions to marry that special one to be your future partner, that's a good example.
And then I read this proverb yesterday:
Proverbs 30:21-23 "Under three things the earth trembles, under four it cannot bear up: 22 a servant who becomes king, a fool who is full of food, 23 an unloved woman who is married, and a maidservant who displaces her mistress."
Combine a person who is unloved by their spouse (or at least it is from their perspective) and have some flirting with an attractive person and someone who shows "love" to them (interest) and flirting becomes more than innocent friendly dialogue. The proverb says this thing is something in which the earth trembles! Trembles?!? It can't bear to see things like this happen. It's things that just shouldn't happen. They often lead to danger, danger so crazy that the world just trembles in anticipation of what will happen.
What do you think?
I wonder where the term "cheat" was first use to describe this? The bible commonly uses the word adultery. But more specifically, my real thought for the day is wondering whether flirting is cheating or is it just "innocent" friendly dialogue (quotations because those who flirt often say "oh, I didn't mean anything by it".
I say this not because I'm currently guilty of this (nor am I saying I've never been), I'm just saying. Flirting seems like nothing, but it doesn't usually happen when a spouse is around, it happens to people the person finds attractive, it happened as you were making decisions to marry that special one to be your future partner, that's a good example.
And then I read this proverb yesterday:
Proverbs 30:21-23 "Under three things the earth trembles, under four it cannot bear up: 22 a servant who becomes king, a fool who is full of food, 23 an unloved woman who is married, and a maidservant who displaces her mistress."
Combine a person who is unloved by their spouse (or at least it is from their perspective) and have some flirting with an attractive person and someone who shows "love" to them (interest) and flirting becomes more than innocent friendly dialogue. The proverb says this thing is something in which the earth trembles! Trembles?!? It can't bear to see things like this happen. It's things that just shouldn't happen. They often lead to danger, danger so crazy that the world just trembles in anticipation of what will happen.
What do you think?
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Experiencing Youth Ministry Fellowship Style...Who's In?
So this whole thing starts tomorrow. This starting of youth/student/teen ministry for us at Fellowship Church is one that has been started and started and started but somehow finds itself dwindling. As becoming the new Family Ministries Director, I pray that this will be a beginning we won't have to see happen again.
It hasn't been an easy task to do. Many people see the need but don't see them in it. Many people wonder if I even notice the need...but lets not be so stupid. Getting something like this has been a process. It's finding a couple of people who have the passion for teens as well as the entrepreneurship to see things from the beginning...that's hard work! God has all of a sudden brought people together who have had such combinations and has really brought this task to reality this past couple of months.
As we start this thing, I am excited. I am nervous. I have been networking with my friends locally and all over the United States, (guys who know what it takes in New England, guys who have done this over and over helping getting things started, guys who are from the leading churches in America with thousands of teens coming through their doors every week meeting Jesus for the first time) getting pointers and tips on what to keep focus on these tender beginning steps.
And I have a feeling God is going to knock Fellowship Church over with what can happen. We only have about 10 teenagers currently in our church. But from the talk of people our first turn out could be well over double that! We'll have kids who have never been in the doors of a church before. What will they expect? Will we be prepared? Will we look like we are excellent at what we do and deeply care for the souls of these kids? Pray for an awesome summer and if you can help send kids to camp let me know. Yes I want your money, but more importantly God wants to use it for His glory. How about investing in the now and the future!
What do you think it takes to see teens meet with God?
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Hide It? Forgive It? Who's the subject of the verb?
Proverbs has this way of stating truth that when you try to slow down and digest it, the meaning takes on many flavors. This verse does just that.
Proverbs 17:9 "He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends."
Who is the subject here? Is it the person who covers the offense the one who did the offense? It just says someone covers/hides/conceals it. Does it mean that you don't tell people when you mess up because you love the other person too much to start a quarrel (cf. 19:14)? Is this idea even supported by other scripture? Who would want confess every time they sinned? How would that do for you for building close relationships when they realize what a sinner you are and it's best to stay away from evil people (since all sin, all are evil, all would have no friends). But is it okay to believe this first one of concealing truth from someone to promote love? What other verses enforce that thought?
Or does it mean that the other person conceals the offense that they know about? They don't bring it up even though they know about it. The would be the contrasting thought to the second half in which the writers of proverbs usually like to do. It's the comparing of the better and worse scenario. However, how does this proverbs deal with verses like 17:15 which states that we shouldn't acquit the quilty?
Or does the word conceal mean forgiveness in some metaphorical way as in Psalm 32:1, 5? This then supports the idea that forgiveness means that you keep things hidden and covered up about the person who made an offense once confession has been made, implying that the offense was confronted?
Then how ever you want to understand the first part determines how you understand the second half. If it's you who does the offense and chooses to conceal it to promote love, then you must not repeat the offense or you're choosing to separate close friends ("your sin will find you out" kind of thing). If it's you who decides to conceal the offense you know about, then you must choose not to repeat the matter to anyone (gossip kind of thing). If it's you who forgives someone else's offense, then you must choose not to bring it up again to them (reinforcing the idea that forgiveness is concealing and blotting out forever the offense, not using it as ammo so to speak).
In either case, all happenings and results can be good wisdom. The Hebrew text seems to support either case grammatically. What's your take?
Proverbs 17:9 "He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends."
Who is the subject here? Is it the person who covers the offense the one who did the offense? It just says someone covers/hides/conceals it. Does it mean that you don't tell people when you mess up because you love the other person too much to start a quarrel (cf. 19:14)? Is this idea even supported by other scripture? Who would want confess every time they sinned? How would that do for you for building close relationships when they realize what a sinner you are and it's best to stay away from evil people (since all sin, all are evil, all would have no friends). But is it okay to believe this first one of concealing truth from someone to promote love? What other verses enforce that thought?
Or does it mean that the other person conceals the offense that they know about? They don't bring it up even though they know about it. The would be the contrasting thought to the second half in which the writers of proverbs usually like to do. It's the comparing of the better and worse scenario. However, how does this proverbs deal with verses like 17:15 which states that we shouldn't acquit the quilty?
Or does the word conceal mean forgiveness in some metaphorical way as in Psalm 32:1, 5? This then supports the idea that forgiveness means that you keep things hidden and covered up about the person who made an offense once confession has been made, implying that the offense was confronted?
Then how ever you want to understand the first part determines how you understand the second half. If it's you who does the offense and chooses to conceal it to promote love, then you must not repeat the offense or you're choosing to separate close friends ("your sin will find you out" kind of thing). If it's you who decides to conceal the offense you know about, then you must choose not to repeat the matter to anyone (gossip kind of thing). If it's you who forgives someone else's offense, then you must choose not to bring it up again to them (reinforcing the idea that forgiveness is concealing and blotting out forever the offense, not using it as ammo so to speak).
In either case, all happenings and results can be good wisdom. The Hebrew text seems to support either case grammatically. What's your take?
Monday, June 16, 2008
Why Lead?
So this past week our pastor, Marty Holman, brought us a message in this series "One Prayer," and challenged us to pray "Make Us Lead." He used passages out of Hebrews 12 which speaks of discipline, endurance, and running a race. It's a passage that speaks of suffering as beneficial in the long term. It's a passage that speaks of hope and encouragement for suffering. We are not alone. So this life of living for righteousness is one that can be ran with confidence, audacity, and strength. It's a race where the rewards are righteousness and peace and eternity in an unshakable kingdom!
Sounds pretty exciting. But why is it that there seems to be less and less people willing to lead? When you talk about taking a leadership role in some ministry at your local church, there's hesitation. Why? We're all inadequate, so stop using that one. And in fact, that's the way God likes it. He wants it to be about Him, not your abilities. Maybe because it's just a scary thing to do. After all, the bible is full of passages about being held accountable for how we manage the things God gives us (Ezekiel 3; Matt. 12:36; Luke 16:2). Yet, see this word accountable shouldn't necessarily be a scary term, unless you're living a life of evil and unrighteousness.
The word often used is apodidomi which means to give back according to some incurred obligation. It's like paying taxes or a light bill. You pay according to what you make and what you used. God gives us money, family, ministry, salvation, etc. and asks that in return we are accountable to Him for what we do with that. Do we keep it for ourselves and not give back? Could we ever give enough to pay back God?
Is it such a huge task that the weight of it is scary? Certainly those who are poor stewards will have to give back word on what happened and will be taken out of leadership. God wants growth from what He gives. Yet, Jesus said His work is easy and His burden is light. Hebrews tells us that we're not in this alone. Jesus said that if we abide in Him, our fruit will multiply. That sounds easy enough! And Paul tells us that there is crown and rewards awaiting for those who make payments back to God in an attempt to render complete payback. Maybe we forgot the debt that He paid and forget the blessing of stuff He gives us.
And so we tend to be selfish, discontent, lazy, and make excuses rather than taking the lead. Certainly there will hard times, there will be times that you have to deal with personal illnesses, there will be people who don't respond to your leadership, there will be times that the gifts and offerings back to God will not cover your salary so that you have to get a second or third job making this leadership thing harder to do while more and more people expect and assume great food to be eaten and when their desires and expectations are not met, they lash out at you as the leader as though their entire situation and circumstance and ministry load and relationship with God rested solely in your hands.
But it is all worth it to be able to give back to God a little something He gives us called Life. So before anyone asks you about taking the lead... take it, give it, do it, jump in, give back. Don't look back, don't look around to see if others are running, and don't give up if you pull a hamstring. "Make Us Lead."
Sounds pretty exciting. But why is it that there seems to be less and less people willing to lead? When you talk about taking a leadership role in some ministry at your local church, there's hesitation. Why? We're all inadequate, so stop using that one. And in fact, that's the way God likes it. He wants it to be about Him, not your abilities. Maybe because it's just a scary thing to do. After all, the bible is full of passages about being held accountable for how we manage the things God gives us (Ezekiel 3; Matt. 12:36; Luke 16:2). Yet, see this word accountable shouldn't necessarily be a scary term, unless you're living a life of evil and unrighteousness.
The word often used is apodidomi which means to give back according to some incurred obligation. It's like paying taxes or a light bill. You pay according to what you make and what you used. God gives us money, family, ministry, salvation, etc. and asks that in return we are accountable to Him for what we do with that. Do we keep it for ourselves and not give back? Could we ever give enough to pay back God?
Is it such a huge task that the weight of it is scary? Certainly those who are poor stewards will have to give back word on what happened and will be taken out of leadership. God wants growth from what He gives. Yet, Jesus said His work is easy and His burden is light. Hebrews tells us that we're not in this alone. Jesus said that if we abide in Him, our fruit will multiply. That sounds easy enough! And Paul tells us that there is crown and rewards awaiting for those who make payments back to God in an attempt to render complete payback. Maybe we forgot the debt that He paid and forget the blessing of stuff He gives us.
And so we tend to be selfish, discontent, lazy, and make excuses rather than taking the lead. Certainly there will hard times, there will be times that you have to deal with personal illnesses, there will be people who don't respond to your leadership, there will be times that the gifts and offerings back to God will not cover your salary so that you have to get a second or third job making this leadership thing harder to do while more and more people expect and assume great food to be eaten and when their desires and expectations are not met, they lash out at you as the leader as though their entire situation and circumstance and ministry load and relationship with God rested solely in your hands.
But it is all worth it to be able to give back to God a little something He gives us called Life. So before anyone asks you about taking the lead... take it, give it, do it, jump in, give back. Don't look back, don't look around to see if others are running, and don't give up if you pull a hamstring. "Make Us Lead."
Thursday, June 12, 2008
10 years, a great start.
Psalm 12
1 Help, Lord, for the godly are no more;the faithful have vanished from among men.
It's June 12. I decided to check out Psalm 12 for this special day and verse one says this. Now the chapter talks a lot about how humans are unfaithful to God, but considering it all, I want to focus it specifically on marriages. Unfaithful marriages in this world perhaps show the spiritual state of human commitment, love, and ability to endure hard times. Not only do most marriages end in divorce, most Christ-followers become less passionate, less wise, and less involved in their relationship with God and what he wants us to accomplish for Him in this world.
Today is my wife and I 10 year wedding anniversary. The 10 years go by so fast. By now, many marriages have already split apart. The numbers are so striking that many young people don't even see the need to get married, especially if sex outside of marriage is okay. Yet, there are many examples of marriages sticking it out around us that it's inspiring. 12 years, 30 years, 50 years.
Now I would be stupid to say that it's been a perfect 10 years without any problems, but it's two depraved human beings who have their own desires and expectations, living with each other, ever trying to develop the passion, the wisdom and the endurance to make it grow in love during ever changing situations, environments, and wants. Of course, it's work, but the reward and the reflection on the other choice is worth it.
So where are you at? Where have all the men gone in this world? How many years have you been staying strong?
Love you dear!
1 Help, Lord, for the godly are no more;the faithful have vanished from among men.
It's June 12. I decided to check out Psalm 12 for this special day and verse one says this. Now the chapter talks a lot about how humans are unfaithful to God, but considering it all, I want to focus it specifically on marriages. Unfaithful marriages in this world perhaps show the spiritual state of human commitment, love, and ability to endure hard times. Not only do most marriages end in divorce, most Christ-followers become less passionate, less wise, and less involved in their relationship with God and what he wants us to accomplish for Him in this world.
Today is my wife and I 10 year wedding anniversary. The 10 years go by so fast. By now, many marriages have already split apart. The numbers are so striking that many young people don't even see the need to get married, especially if sex outside of marriage is okay. Yet, there are many examples of marriages sticking it out around us that it's inspiring. 12 years, 30 years, 50 years.
Now I would be stupid to say that it's been a perfect 10 years without any problems, but it's two depraved human beings who have their own desires and expectations, living with each other, ever trying to develop the passion, the wisdom and the endurance to make it grow in love during ever changing situations, environments, and wants. Of course, it's work, but the reward and the reflection on the other choice is worth it.
So where are you at? Where have all the men gone in this world? How many years have you been staying strong?
Love you dear!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Impossible Mission?
I'm no expert on Ezekiel and it's actually been awhile since I've read the book, but recently I've been reading it slowly.
I strikes me odd that God has given Ezekiel this mission to Israel, to warn them of their wickedness and stubbornness and makes him wait. God gives Ezekiel strength and hardness of heart to endure the challenge. And then God goes into this chapter 3 passage where he tells Ezekiel to be this watchman, to warn the people, and if he did his part he would not be held accountable for their blood. They would die for their own personal sin, but Ezekiel would somehow be held accountable for their blood. What exactly does that mean?
And then to make the matter harder, God tells Ezekiel to shut himself in his house where he can't leave, can't speak and really can't even get up off the floor (chapter 4) for over a year!
How many times does it feel like this that God has given you a passion, a ministry, a job to do, but there are so many road blocks that you wonder whether the mission is true, whether it was meant to be, whether it is possible.
I strikes me odd that God has given Ezekiel this mission to Israel, to warn them of their wickedness and stubbornness and makes him wait. God gives Ezekiel strength and hardness of heart to endure the challenge. And then God goes into this chapter 3 passage where he tells Ezekiel to be this watchman, to warn the people, and if he did his part he would not be held accountable for their blood. They would die for their own personal sin, but Ezekiel would somehow be held accountable for their blood. What exactly does that mean?
And then to make the matter harder, God tells Ezekiel to shut himself in his house where he can't leave, can't speak and really can't even get up off the floor (chapter 4) for over a year!
How many times does it feel like this that God has given you a passion, a ministry, a job to do, but there are so many road blocks that you wonder whether the mission is true, whether it was meant to be, whether it is possible.
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