Anniversary of Adoption

There are two boys in this picture. They are the sons of my wife and I. Flying home from Texas this past week, a guy walking past me and one of my sons said "he's a cute kid, looks like you already." What's interesting about this is that son he was referring to was our adopted son.

On April 12 (Easter), it will be our 5 month anniversary on his adoption. For us, he's always been a part of the family. For our other son, he's always been a little brother. For him, we're his family. And we take pleasure in having it no other way.

What gets me all broken with joy is this amazing connection of adoption that God adopted me. Not because I've had a bad childhood or a bad father (it was all the best and I have a great dad), but simply because God wanted me to be a part of His family! That's good news no matter who you are! He didn't want me to live this life on my own in a world that is broken by sin and living among people broken by sin and living with a myself, a person broken by sin, bent toward evil, heading for hell, separated from the giver of Life.

He wanted me to experience a life with a perfect creator of everything, a wonderful counselor, a prince of peace, an Everlasting Father, the self-existent one, the Big Man in control. He took pleasure in finding a way for me to have this relationship with Him. How cool is that?

Ephesians 1:3-8 "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. 4 For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love 5 he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will-- 6 to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. 7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace 8 that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding."

So on this 5 month anniversary of our son's adoption, it will be God's 2009th anniversary of making known his plan of adopting me. Have you accepted the adoption too? It's a great family to be apart of.

Weekend To Remember Discount

I received this from a guy I have been following through Facebook and his blog. He's a Christian Counselor in South Carolina. For those of you who have heard me talk about the Weekend to Remember Marriage conferences, here is an important discount notice. New England weekends for this conference is this month and next.

"Dear Friends!
Many of you may know of Family Life and their Weekend to Remember Conferences. These are incredible and life-changing marriage conferences. Should you have friends or church members that could use a marriage "pick me up" then let me encourage you to encourage them to consider registering for this conference which is held throughout the US.

I am a Group Leader and if they register through my site they can get an $80 discount.

They can attend a conference in any city but still register through my site and receive the discount.

Here is the link: http://competentcounseling.com/2009/03/17/an-excellent-marriage-solution-for-you/

If you have any questions please let me know.

Much respect for you guys!

Rick Thomas"

Here's a church, there's a church, everywhere's a...

Churches, they're everywhere. Everywhere.

It doesn't take long to see that almost anywhere in the United States, you could find a church to be a part of. It doesn't take long as Christians or church leaders to talk about other churches and what you liked about them. It doesn't take long as Christians or church leaders to talk about a church and what you didn't like about them (it's level of relevance, effectiveness, or depth). It doesn't take long to think there needs to be change.

There is tremendous value in thinking about being fresh and relevant in the American culture of church. It's a must. I'm not denying that. I work on making that happen in our local church. But maybe it's a must because that's what American culture has done to the church?

I think about missionaries who go to places where they are lucky to get a body of believers to assembly without being persecuted. I think about missionaries who go to places where no one has every seen a bible, let alone heard about Jesus.

These places care less about what's the best way to invite others to church, how and what small groups should teach and when they should multiply, or whether the youth group is going on enough bowling nights. Not that they wouldn't care about those things. But there's something more pressing and vital to their Christian journey survival.

They care about true fellowship, fellowship as described in the early church. It's all those some 30 "one anothers" that's in the New Testament. They drink spiritual talk like sweet tea on a hot day. They crave Christian fellowship.

Acts 2:42 "They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship [refers here to close association involving mutual involvement and relationships.], to the breaking of bread [aka Lord's Supper/Communion remembering to point everything back to Jesus] and to prayer."

Now that's fresh and relevant. Is that what you crave?

A Pool of Fools?

When I was a little boy, I didn't think about forming community. I thought about playing with friends. Was I forming a community though?

As I grew older, I didn't think about forming community. I thought about sports and school and going to church. Was I forming a community though?

I hung out with friends at school and played many sports. I went to church and did the youth group thing. I had girlfriends and girls that liked me and girls that I liked. But I never thought I was forming a community. But was I forming a community?

Even throughout college and graduate school, I spent more time on school and work to get me through school, then forming a community. I had friends and got married and volunteered in a church. But still I never heard about forming a community. Yet could I have been forming a community?

Proverbs 18:1-2 "One who has isolated himself seeks his own desires; he rejects all sound judgment. 2 A fool takes no pleasure in understanding but only in disclosing what is on his mind."

These verses describe a complete fool or simpleton. Someone who just doesn't get it. Someone who is not just anti-social, but down right unfriendly. He/she withdraws him/herself because everyone else is just plain stupid. For this person, no one else has anything of true wisdom to say about his/her life. He/she only thinks, they already knows what is best. If he/she does find him/herself in "community," he/she's going to tell everyone his/her "wisdom," and doesn't care to look at it any other way.

I have always been more prone to be kept to myself. "Introvert" some like to call it. I certainly have been called "unfriendly." So could these verses apply to me? Have I never really formed a community? I think there is a level, in hindsight, that my withdrawn from community, true community, put me very close to this person.

And because of this, I think I missed out slightly in understanding more of what people go through and how to let other people know what I go through and to pray through and seek God's Word through and to really allow authenticity move people together towards making a difference, not only in personal growth, but the growth of anyone I form community with.

Community is more than a hang out with friends. Community is more than working together for a common cause. Community is more than a place to voice your opinion. Community is more than just knowing what a verse in the bible is talking about. It's creating a movement of understanding and care for one another. It's the brotherhood of all brotherhoods.

You can choose to stay alone or hang out with friends and think you're forming a community, but you're just a fool that cares about yourself and gaining what you want. You really hurt yourself by not understanding differing ways of looking at things or heeding good advice.

Go ahead. I know it's tough. Take a journey with community.

Who's Your Kids' Pastor?

Tomorrow, March 15, is our church's Family Experience. I have had the privilege in being the Family Ministries Director when we started doing this thing 7 months ago. It's created as a part of the curriculum our church uses (252basics.com/rethinkgroup.org). These creators give us so much for the money when it comes to children's church resources. If you've never heard of them, go check them out.

Anyways, this Family Experience is a great time where the Sunday morning service is changed up a bit and we create a shared church environment for both kids and parents/adults. We are able to convey a biblical virtue through dance, music, drama, story-telling, comic relief and crowd participation. It's enough "entertainment" to keep adults' attention for an hour! Ha ha. (Entertainment just means presenting Jesus with excitement because it's excited to know Jesus, right?)

Growing in a relationship with Jesus Christ is a journey and as an adult we are not there yet. Knowing we are not there yet should encourage us to share with our kids what to expect in this journey. But often times, it leaves us speachless in spiritual talk. We pray that our kids will just get it. But maybe, they won't. Parents are really their kids number one fan, encourager, and pastor.

We know this isn't easy to get started, let alone continue. That's why this environment is important for you to bring yourselves and your kids. We go to the movies with our kids. We go to the park with our kids. We share experiences with our kids to help in that bond. Why not bond around spiritual talk?

Ok then, see you there!

What Gray Am I?

Gray is my favorite color. I haven't really found anyone who's favorite color is gray. Most people are either some vibrant color like orange, red, yellow, purple or some deep color like black, brown, or blue. Most people see gray as neutral and boring.

It had me wondering what that all means. Is there a connection between personality and favorite colors? A quick search on the google search brought me to this post (http://www.care2.com/greenliving/favorite-color-personality.html). Here's what it said about gray as a favorite color.

"Gray: The color of caution and compromise, diligent Grays search for composure and peace and often work hard without reward. Older Grays like life to run on an even keel with few ups and downs. Young Grays may be withdrawing from life and suppressing their personalities. Grays often have good business ability and tend to work too much."

What if my gray was a light gray or what if my gray was a dark gray?

"Black: Dignified and impressive without being showy, Black people want to give the appearance of mystery, but their preference may also indicate a suppression of desires and worldly aims, suggesting hidden depths and inner longings."

"White: Symbolic of purity, innocence and naivete, white has strong connotations of youth and purity. If you are an older person, your preference for white could indicate a desire for perfection and impossible ideals, maybe an attempt to recapture lost youth and freshness. It may also symbolize a desire for simplicity or the simple life. "

And then there is also shades of gray like slategray. Wikipedia says this: "In the RGB color model used by computer displays, it is created by mixing equal amounts of red, green, and blue light." So am I also a mixture of these colors?

"Red: The color of strength, health, and vitality, Red is often the color chosen by someone outgoing, aggressive, vigorous and impulsive—or someone who would like to be! It goes with an ambitious nature but those who choose it can be abrupt at times, determined to get all they can out of life, quick to judge people and take sides. Red people are usually optimistic and can’t stand monotony; they are rather restless and not at all introspective, so they may be unaware of their own shortcomings. They find it hard to be objective and may blame others for any mishaps. Quiet people with a preference for red may feel the need for the warmth, strength and life-giving qualities of the color, or they blanket their true feelings under a sober exterior. Red is usually chosen by people with open and uncomplicated natures, with a zest for life.

Green: The color of harmony and balance, Green symbolizes hope, renewal and peace, and is usually liked by the gentle and sincere. Greens are generally frank, community-minded people, fairly sociable but preferring peace at any price. Green people can be too self-effacing, modest and patient, so they may get exploited by others. They are usually refined, civilized and reputable.

Blue: Soft, soothing, compassionate and caring, Blue is the color of deliberation and introspection, conservatism and duty. Patient, persevering, conscientious, sensitive and self-controlled, Blues like to be admired for their steady character and wisdom. They are faithful, but are often worriers with somewhat inflexible beliefs and can be too cautious, and suspicious of flamboyant behavior. "

And you thought gray was neutral?

Which one do you think describes me?

Staying True To What You Love?

Working in a church every day. That's been my dream since I was in high school. Somewhat naive, I don't know. After graduating high school, I ended up going to a bible college for a BA in Missions and Bible. I worked in a sub shop and then a grocery store putting my way through college. Still my goal of working full time on a church staff was there.

I stayed at college and went to graduate school and graduated with my Master of Divinity. I ended up still working at that grocery store and made my way to manager, putting my way through graduate school. Still my goal of working full time on a church staff was there.

I love the idea of the local church. I love the idea of leading people into living a life of joy through Christ. I love being a pastor. I spent most of those years through bible college/graduate school volunteering in our local church's children and youth ministries.

After 9 years of bible college and graduate school, I felt ready to gain more experience by finally going into a full time staff position. Not sure where to go, my family took a break and moved to New England. The goal was a six month break and then move to our future home of full time church staff. Something about the church we ended up going to up here kept us here, but it was not full time staff position. I worked construction to stay at this church. I love the local church.

My bible training didn't prepare me for my construction job. Sometimes I feel that my education was meaningless for a real world work place where I need money to support myself and my family. Sometimes I feel that no other person stays somewhere because they like being there, and do it for free to nothing. (If you were a teacher and you lost your job, you would look for another school to teach. You wouldn't just stay teaching there for free and find a night job to support yourself on, would you?). I've continued to volunteer at our local church and a couple of years ago took more of a leadership role and became part time staff at the local church. Yet still have to work outside the church for making a living. Yet I still love the local church.

And now most people continue to ask me what I'm doing for work and if I've found anything and what am I looking for. These are the hardest questions to answer to express my desires. I love the local church. I have 9 years of bible training. I love being a pastor. That's what I'm looking for. Anything else is not fulfilling my dream and to what I feel God has called me to and given me the desire to do.

What would you do?

I'm Sarcastic, I Need Brain Surgery

I enjoy watching the show "House." The team of doctors seek out these rare mixture of symptoms in the hope of finding the answer before the person dies. It's always an array of trial and error and maybe it's this or maybe it's that, but mostly in the end the answer was something simple and quite treatable. I mostly enjoy the show because of the lead doctor's use of sarcasm. A true role model. Ha ha.

What's interesting about this last episode and I've seen a few trends definitely heading this way is the idea that outbursts of rudeness and anger and other emotional expressions are rooted in a neurological malfunction. I once heard of a study that wanted to go into the jail system and remove the anger part of criminal's brains. There's probably a lot of scientific support for all of this. Don't misread me here. I'm not doubting that there are real tissue diseases which affect the mind and normal functionality of control, etc. I'm wondering about the idea that since every person has parts of their brain controlling certain emotions, that when those emotions are extreme (now that we are defining what is abnormal), the answer is to remove that part, because there is no other alternative. It is as though it's a locked position. If so, is this the next step from drugs? Because even then, drugs only mask the neurological malfunction which really need to be removed.

Besides all that, here's my thinking. On the spiritual side, if this is true, is there any reason churches should be teaching character or virtue development, especially to children and teenagers? Does the bible become irrelevant in teaching the importance of dealing with anger and allowing God to work on our thoughts and motivations? What really is the root of the issue? Can it be both? Can both coincide as truth with one another? Any suggestions on where the bible and science in these instances hit on the scale?

I'm not here to start a fight about drug usage or scientific evidence for disorders, etc. Just playing on where something like this leaves the church and spiritual understandings? Seems like the more we move into this direction, the less people see the church in being able to be relevant. Or is it because the church often times doesn't know or understand more in these areas and mesh the two together? Does meshing better enrich God's word or does it change it to make the theory of the day happy?

Church becomes more of this "created thing" that talks about heaven, sin, and hell, only to keep people in control. This seems to be a growing census. The religion that is growing faster and faster is "non-religion:" agnostic, atheist, and skeptic. There are numerous reasons perhaps why, but could this be one of them? How should the church approach such issues?

Sorry For Pain I Cause

There are a few sayings I have around my office. And there are a couple of them I need to write out and add to the collection. One that has been there for awhile, I failed at today.

"To be in pain is not a reason to be a pain."

Pain certainly is relative to a person. Some can withstand a lot while others break at the slightest pinch. But despite my situation or what seems to be happening to me, I must not be a pain to others. Even my venting of frustration turns into me attacking people. Part of the role I am in I suppose plays into all of this as well.

Please forgive me for casting my pain in an inappropriate way to cause pain to you.

Don't Let the Snow In

So it snowed about 10 inches a couple of nights ago. The kids didn't have school again. But it was a great time to get out there and play in it. But think about what goes into preparing yourself to enjoy the snow.

One of the biggest pains and something that can really make you call it quits is when snow gets in places you don't need it. Inside your gloves. Down your neck. In your boot.

For some areas in our lives, we leave ourselves open to let things ruin our fun in the snow by letting the snow get in places that it's not suppose to be. Call the snow this world we live in. Call the snow good relationships, but... We leave our marriage boots untied. We leave our Godly responsibilities loose. We find that a little snow on our neck is really refreshing and create excuses why it's fine. And then all of sudden we realize we want out. We want to get the boots off and find a warm pair of slippers. We take the gloves off and try to get the snow out, but it's too late. We have to find a place to warm them up in order to put them back on.

Button yourself up. Tie up loose ends. Take care of what you need to take care of before it gets too cold. Enjoy the snow. Enjoy the snow where it belongs.